I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize