Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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