No subtext here. People are naked.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize