I want to stick my p in your. b.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
