THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Shame - the story of my life.
Shame is for Republicans.
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