I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
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