my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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