how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
