GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
