Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
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