Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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