He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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