I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
