just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
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