i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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