I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
