They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
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