dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
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You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
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official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2