Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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