just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
party gras won. party gras always wins.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Randomize
