the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
