stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
The power of my boobs compel you
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
