He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
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