I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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