What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Randomize
