dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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