why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Randomize
