In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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