They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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