Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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