Pappa wants mamma naked
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
