Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize