I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
