Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
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