A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
