and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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