I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
