Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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