we're blogging at a bar
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize