she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Randomize
