wat bout pragnant strippers??
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
