how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
