I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
