But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
