i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
