Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize
