you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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