It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
