erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Randomize
