Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
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