i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
